The contents? Ah now there’s a question.
I think this is borne out of a lot of thinking. A great deal of observing situations, and some crappy real life worries.
Firstly I must state this. my glass is half full. Of that there is no doubt.
However, there comes a point when you consider things. Take a long hard look at “things”… Proceed or stop.
This is another blog that’s been resting in my “draft” folder for a few months. Who’d have thought a certain bar would give me the clarity to finish it? Not me. Anyway.
You might be wondering what in the name of hell this has to do with whisky? Well quite a lot actually. And if you read on you might discover why…
I’ve spent a huge amount of my life being on the outside. The bystander. The one who responds to “I need help!” The one who would drop everything and run (though probably drive through the night to help people.)
Do I continue…
So about 3 years ago I decided to change that… I lost a load of weight in 3 months (I have an underlying condition, so any loss is a ruddy hard task.)
I found a little confidence went a long way. I started travelling by myself. A scary thing to do. But I did it. I could get up when I liked. Stop and gaze in windows. Speak to strangers. Smile at strangers. Tried things I never thought I would. Treated myself to things I wouldn’t necessarily do.
Then I stopped.
A dark cloud gathered above me. And I had to fight (alone) to get through it.
I reached out to some who gave me their harsh opinion in return. But I got through it. Eventually. I also had those that cared. And they know who they are and how truly grateful I am.
I then recalled some advice.
I sat alone seeing in 2016 and opened my Twitter account again. I needed the jovial, kind and dear friends I remembered laughing with. Along the way I’ve met some more.
So where does the whisky come into this? Well a lady I chatted with saw something in me. She listened. Through our long discussions and said I needed company. Friendship. Festivals.
The funny thing is, we both thought “music!”. So I decided to take her advice…albeit latterly and realised it would be whisky.
Well it’s nearly a year since my first whisky festival (first fudge too.) Oh and hell, might as well say nearly a year since my first blog entry…
And what a year.
It’s been a journey. I’ve met some truly lovely people. I’ve met some truly hilarious people. I’ve met some truly kind people. I’ve met some wonderful friends.
I went to two festivals (or probably three) last weekend. And guess what? No panic attack beforehand. A milestone.
I’ve found my voice and sometimes I even use it. I’ve found people want to come up to me and say hello. I’ve found that they’re interested in speaking to me. To listen to me. To hug me. To laugh with me.
And this has healed me. It’s given me confidence. My contents are happier. There’s a smile on my face. It’s not all been easy. But nothing worthwhile ever comes without a few bumps along the way.
So I will just continue on.
Hopefully you’ll all get the point of this. I am the bottle. And it’s not always the label that counts. I might portray that I’m strong (even say I’m strong), but those that take the time to see the real Sarah they know.
And for that reason alone I say “thank you” x